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How to Catch a Cheater

How to Catch a Cheater Image
Tyler Hernandez Profile Image
Tyler Hernandez

Feeling like your partner is cheating on you is not a nice feeling to be sitting with. It makes you uncomfortable, unsafe, and you want to get the answers to make an informed decision and move forward. Knowing the truth is better for you in the long run.

Today, we will be sharing with you signs to look out for and how you can catch your partner cheating on you.

Signs That Your Partner Could Be Cheating on You

Before you can catch your partner out on cheating, you need to make sure that your partner is showing signs that they are cheating in the first place. If your partner is showing any of the signs below, there is reason to believe that they are cheating on you.

They Have Improved Their Appearances.

One of the most significant changes that you will notice is their appearance. Your partner might all of a sudden start to work out, eat healthier, and be more conscious of their appearance. Do not confuse trying to be healthier with cheating. If your partner talks to you about making this lifestyle change, they are not cheating.

When the change happens out of nowhere, and you confront them, and they have no answer for the sudden change, that is when you can get suspicious.

They Are Possessive Over Their Phone and Smart Devices.

People who are cheating tend to use their phones and computers more often than before. They also guard their devices more than before. If you were able to use your partner’s phone and now suddenly there are passwords, and they won’t share the password with you, this is a sign that they have something to hide.

Ask for the password, if you can get the password, you do not need to worry, but if your partner won’t share the password or give you the device to use, you might be living with someone who is cheating on you.

You Cannot Get Hold of Them for a Significant Amount of Time.

Some people have busy lives. They are hard to get hold of during the day because of their busy work lives or lifestyle. If you cannot get hold of your partner for long periods, you need to start taking note of the times.

During work hours, it is hard to get hold of people, so this is normal.

If you cannot get hold of your partner after hours and on weekends, you need to listen to your gut. If your partner is cheating on you, they are less likely to answer your calls and texts. They might give you good reasons but, if you cannot get hold of them on a business trip or are always working late, this can be a bad sign.

They No Longer Want to Connect on an Emotional or Physical Level.

This sign can go one of two ways. Either, they try and overcompensate by giving you more physical affection and trying to connect with you on an emotional level more than usual.

Or, they pull away from you because they are getting what they need physically and emotionally from someone else. Instead of being partners and on the same level, you guys are just co-existing and, they are building a life behind your back with someone else.

The sex Is Different.

Another sign that your partner could be cheating on you is that the sex is different. Your partner might have new moves that you might enjoy or not like. When you are with someone, it is normal to try new things. They may be learning these new tricks and techniques from an outside relationship.

During sex, you might feel like your partner is somewhere else. As the emotional connection during sex is no longer there.

How to Catch Them in the Act

You have that nagging feeling in the pit of your stomach, you are sure that they are cheating on you, and you have noticed the signs that they are cheating. Now you want the proof.

Below are ways in which you can prove that your partner is in fact cheating on you.

1. Use spyware Apps.

This is a great way for you to catch a cheater! All you need to do is simply install a spyware app onto their device. You can use Spy Tracker for example. This will give you complete access to their device. You can see everything that they do and it is the ultimate way for you to bust a cheater once and for all.

You need to keep in mind that even though this is a great way to catch your partner cheating, there is a possibility of legal ramifications if they decide to take action.

2. Follow Them Around.

An old-school way of finding out if someone is cheating on you is to follow them around. When your partner says they will meet up with some friends, watch them go out the door and start to follow them. Keep a safe distance so that they do not get suspicious.

Once you have arrived, see who they meet. If it is just friends, you do not need to worry. However, if it is someone you do not know, you might have just caught them red-handed.

3. Change Your Plans Unexpectedly.

Cheaters keep their lives in check. They have their times planned out well so that nothing collides. To catch a cheater, you can change plans that you might have. Let’s say you always go out together on a Friday night.

One week, say you cannot do this Friday and rather change it to another day. See what excuse they come up with. If they tell you they have a party with friends and cannot cancel, ask to come with to the party. If they are not cheating, they won’t mind if you tag along.

Keep in mind that a change might not always be possible. Try this step more than once and see how your partner reacts. If you always get shut down, you know they are cheating.

4. Show Up at Their Workplace Unannounced.

If your partner tells you that they are at work and you do not trust that, show up announced. You can then see what the reaction is. The best for you to go is during lunchtime. This will allow you to either surprise your partner and you both can go out for lunch together, or you will scare your partner and catch them out.

You can also take note of how the secretaries respond to you being there. They know more than you think. If they are shocked and try and stop you from seeing your partner with an unusual excuse, you know something fishy is happening.

5. Check Their Phone, Messages, and Other Social Media Apps.

If you have noticed that your partner has been proactive on their phones lately, you can try and sneak a peek at their messages. If by any chance they leave their phone open, do not just check the normal massages. You want to look for the archive chats. That is where most cheaters hide the conversations they do not want you to find.

You can also check their social media apps such as Instagram and go through their DMs. Also, have a look at their call logs. Cheaters can be a bit naive, so you want to look out for unusual names such as Aunty Helen or Uncle Joe. Most people do not call their aunt and uncle multiple times a day for a long time.

6. Track Their Spending by Checking on Their Bank Statements.

If you have a joint bank account, this step will be a lot easier. At the end of the month, have a look at what money has been spent. If you notice anything that you are not aware of such as restaurant bills, lingerie bills and so on, make a note of this all and keep track of it. It might be a present for you. If you do not do receive the gift, you know it was for someone else.

There is modern-day software such as Mint that keeps track of your expenses. If your partner has this app, try to take a look at what is being spent. Make a copy and keep it in a hidden and safe place. This is a good thing for you to have on hand when you want to confront your partner about cheating.

Time to Ask if They Are Cheating on You

Now that you have all the evidence that leads to cheating, it is time to come forward and ask your partner if they are cheating on you.

See how they react to the question. Often, if they are cheating, they will get nervous, defensive and try to avoid the conversation by telling you that you are crazy.

Show your partner the evidence that you have collected. See how they can justify everything that you found. Cheaters are used to lying, so they are good at coming up with excuses.

Keep asking, and they will eventually crack under pressure and forget the lie they have told you. If they are not cheating on you, explain why you feel the way that you do. This will allow you to mend the issues you are currently having in your relationship.


At this point, you now know what signs to look out for. You also understand how to catch your spouse cheating on you. Confronting them about this issue can be rather intimidating and scary. Take a deep breath, you can do this.

Keep in mind that you deserve to be treated with respect.

Cheating happens for a lot of reasons that we do not always understand. It is better that you know what is going on.

Learn the truth so that you can decide what is best for you in the long run. You can move on from this and find someone that respects you, loves you, and wants to be with you and only you for the rest of your lives.

Written by

Tyler Hernandez Profile Image

Tyler Hernandez

PhoneChatLines' Founder

Tyler Hernandez is the founder of Tyler is a visionary for new startup ideas, and in his free time he enjoys writing, eating pizza, and traveling.

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